Apparently… maybe.

Dick doping – who knew?

What lengths will they go to?

‘Just an extra inch…’ – OK I’ll stop now.

So, this is the news of bizarre allegations in ski jumping that have caught the attention of the World Anti-Doping Agency (WADA). Reports, first published by the German newspaper Bild and dubbed ‘Penisgate’, claim some male ski jumpers may be injecting hyaluronic acid into their genitals.

I know what you’re thinking but there seems to be some kind of logic to this. The jumpers get measured by a 3D body scanning process that decides on the size of their competition suits. Suit dimensions are crucial: larger suits trap more air and can measurably increase jump distance, and measurements are taken from the lowest point of the athlete’s genitals.

So, low hanging fruit, it would seem, is desirable in a ski jumper.

Long balls? Grab those skis lad!

Last year it seems there was a to-do when the Norwegian team were fpoumnd to have tampered with the crotch area in their suits to make them slightly bigger. One study in the scientific journal Frontiers found that every 2cm in suit size circumference reduced drag by 4% and increased lift by 5%. It said that a 2cm change in the suits was equivalent to an extra- and massive – 5.8 metres in jump length.

WADA has said it has no evidence these practices are actually happening, but officials are willing to investigate whether such methods could count as doping or pose health risks. The controversy comes amid a history of suit-related rule bending, including recent suspensions for improper suit alterations.

Bild quoted a doctor, Kamran Karim, who said: “It is possible to achieve a temporary, visual thickening of the penis by injecting paraffin or hyaluronic acid. Such an injection is not medically indicated and is associated with risks.”

I mean, us cycling fans know what pro cyclists (and then not so pro too) will do to get ahead, but this is nuts – literally.