Spotted at Stage 1 of the Critérium du Dauphiné, the new Trek Madone bike just about broke the cycling internet with its ‘remarkable’ new design that features a split seat tube.

Trek have yet to confirm whether true or not but many commentators have already decided this is not in fact a design feature to improve aerodynamics but actually a designated ‘Onigiri Storage Space’ (that’s a rice triangle btw)… or rather one commentator has, and that’s me.

But I mean look, put 2 and 2 together:

Let’s flip it:

… and you get Trek’s revolutionary OSS™.

Which will no doubt be fully customisable.

One things is for sure, it’s not a looker, this bike.

But what’s a bicycle brand to do when dropped seat stays have been done and replicated to within an inch of their poor lives? Shrug its shoulders and give up finding a new gimmick to flog on to the poor (ok, not so poor) unsuspecting lycra-bedecked masses?

Heck no. Dust off that mouse and flex those CAD muscles and come up with something new and improved.

I mean, someone will buy it, right? No matter how clunky, inelegant, insincere (yes I just wrote that) a bike looks, someone, with a penchant for onigiri, will indeed buy it…

The Trek Madone Tri Bike with on-board OSS™. If you can’t beat it, eat it.

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