C.P. COACHING SYSTEMS

Before you read on, here’s our KOJO Collective feature from our HA GIANG LOOP Tour last April – we just came back from the 2026 tour and will be back there in November, see KOJO for details!

the natural Tour de France

1–2 minutes

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so you know bodybuilding has a lot of small-penised men with inferiority complexes, buckets of creosote with which they like to paint with thick, stiff bristled paintbrushes into every nook and crannie, and speedos that ride up to where the sun don’t shine?

oh, and it has a mammoth roid culture?

Ronnie Coleman, admitted roidhead
Ronnie Coleman, admitted roidhead

well it’s so bad in fact that as well as the roid-pumped official bodybuilding championships that are held, another bunch of non-roid taking BB’ers have their own natural bodybuilding championships. they may as call the other one the ‘Drug Fueled BodyBuilding Champs’…

which got me to thinking.

how about a ‘Natural Tour de France’?

ok, let’s wait now for the guy who mails in to say ‘hey jeez man, no one was positive at the last Tour!’

uh huh. and Hincapie never tested positive did he. nor… you get my drift.

[read this for more info: http://cyclingtips.com.au/2013/04/oxygen-in-a-pill-the-next-big-thing-in-sports-doping/

“Current anti-doping is a total failure. Success rate is extremely poor. Perhaps the best proof of its failure is a statement by WADA’s director general David Howman, from 2011: “We are catching the dopey dopers, but not the sophisticated ones.””]

anyway, just a thought…

interesting video here, Jay Cutler at the end says ‘you do what you do to win, if you wanna call that cheating, fine.’

Lance! take note!

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9 responses to “the natural Tour de France”

  1. mythbuster Avatar
    mythbuster

    I like this http://www.naturalbodybuilding.com/pages/pages/hall_of_shame.php

    Need that for cycling, instead of doper grand fondos and “charity” events.

    Reply
    1. crankpunk Avatar
      crankpunk

      not the UCI, the UNCI! thanks for the link!

      Reply
  2. Shane Avatar
    Shane

    Interesting, but there’s an obvious question – how do you ensure the clean TDF is clean? Same as the clean lifting competitions. If the tests are not adequate to catch the cheaters as things are presently, surely there’s no way to know if the clean Tour is as is described?

    Surely some will consider signing up for an event where they could in theory have even more of an advantage by being sneaky/careful in their doping?

    Reply
    1. crankpunk Avatar
      crankpunk

      indeedy, as mythbuster’s link shows, they do cheat there too. what is interesting though is how they get banned for one doping positive, for life…

      Reply
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